The fantasy makes sense: So we asked five women to share the details of their most sizzling flings — and what it was that made those hookups so hot. Use their tales as inspiration to fire up your sex life. He was cute with a hippie vibe and said he was a guitar teacher. At midnight we kissed — in a joking way at first, but then things heated up. We were making out on the dance floor when he asked me to go home with him. He carried my shoes because my feet were sore. The sex was wonderful, but the best part was the morning after.
He seemed to be signaling that he wanted me to stick around. We continued to hang out until the afternoon. Neither of us felt any rush to make it end. Eventually he walked me to the door and kissed me goodbye. Now offer your respect. Ask if she wants to have breakfast. Show thoughtfulness and creativity, says Gunsaullus — prepare a delicious omelette, or pack up bagels and coffee to take on a hangover-clearing walk in the park.
But the men around me were as annoying as squawking seagulls fighting over french fries. One guy kept asking me to come out on his boat the next day.
But then this guy appeared. Gorgeous red hair, broad shoulders, muscular arms, strong hands-and really chill. We got into a conversation about my day. He asked questions; he listened. Later he asked if I wanted to hit another bar and meet his friends. At the end of the night, we went home together.
Instead, aim to reveal something about your character — and learn about hers — by finding common ground, says Robert Burriss, a psychologist at Northumbria University. The simpler you keep things, the better, adds Gary Lewandowski, chair of the psychology department at Monmouth University. After a few rounds I was feeling good, so I turned to one and kissed him. But soon my friend was fast asleep on the couch. And then the strangest thing happened.
She looked straight at me and gave me a huge grin. It was an unspoken agreement: Sure enough, when the big day came, a single guy was at my table. We smiled at each other, but he was on the opposite side, talking to another woman. I saw it as a challenge: I asked him to dance and we ended up hanging out for the rest of the party.
Later — much later — we went to his place. After sleeping with the same person for so long, it felt strange and thrilling to be in bed with someone else. It was the first one-night stand of my life, and it gave me exactly the confidence I needed. Other women who see your gal pals laughing at your jokes will be intrigued.
This was about six years ago — before Craigslist was so sketchy — so I tried my luck with a stranger. The man who replied provided a close-up photo, which highlighted his eyes. We made plans to meet at the theatre. But he and I were immediately attracted to each other.
We were flirting, kidding around, getting close. Part of what made the night so incredible was the sense of power I felt. I had the tickets — this was my show, so to speak. I was wearing a sexy outfit, right down to the lingerie. Back at his place, he undressed me. I remember how excited he seemed as he removed my clothing. While power and authority are attractive qualities, so is self-confidence.
You should still pick up tabs and hold doors. But if your date has been to the restaurant where you two are dining, for example, ask her to order for you.
Getty; A version of this article originally appeared at menshealth.